2. “I'm scared to death. I don't know what will happen next. I can't trust my parents to keep me safe.”

Home is the child’s entire world, and with parents in conflict, home indeed looks to be horribly and completely unsafe. A child knows she’s dependent on her parents for nearly everything—food, shelter, comfort, protection, guidance. How unsafe the world must look if her two saviors are at war with each other.

“High conflict between parents not only causes children immense suffering, it causes serious problems in their development. They soon have the sense that they cannot trust any adults.”

What About the Kids? p. 204.

—Judith S. Wallerstein and Sandra Blakeslee

“Kids fear parental anger focused on the other
parent ... When parents fight, it makes kids wonder and worry. They wonder what's going to happen next. They worry about one or both of you being hurt, or that in the midst of the rage they are witnessing, they will be hurt.”

Good Parenting Through Your Divorce, p. 36.

—Mary Ellen Hannibal

“In a home marked by conflict and unpredictability, children do not have a deep and abiding trust in their caretakers”

Divorce Wars
—Interventions with Families in Conflict, p. 49.

—Elizabeth M. Ellis